No One Told Me This About Marriage

Two months after graduating from college I was pregnant, engaged, and living in a new city. I received advice, most of it unsolicited, about what I should not do as a wife. I also heard a bit of the negative sides of marriage. While some of the advice came in handy, no one told me that I would get to fall in love with a new person as we both continued along our journey and evolved. No one told me that it was possible to love a person more and more each day as the years would go by. Luckily, I got to find this out on my own.

Jarvis and I celebrated two years of marriage earlier this year and next month will make five years that we’ve been in a committed relationship. We’ve watched each other champion through trials and go through changes. We’ve watched each other grow and evolve into new versions of ourselves as individuals, parents, and as a unit. Most of all, we’ve loved through each chapter of our journey. It’s been a dope experience to see him change and it’s been exciting getting to love the “new” him in every season. It’s been refreshing that he’s also been able to love me more as I grow and that he encourages my evolution every step of the way.

Listening to all of the pre-marital advice, it seemed to me as though marriage was a destination and that once you said “I do” you arrived. I see things differently now. I see marriage as a journey designed to help you become your highest version while learning to love another person unconditionally as they become their highest version. I look forward to more years of growth and changes. I look forward to more love.

Featured Image: Photography by Vance Tennant Instagram account: @vzlsbylang

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